


Hold Me While You Wait

by Ephemeral_Joy



Category: Outer Banks (TV)
Genre: Cuddling & Snuggling, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, Insomnia, Literal Sleeping Together, Nightmares, Trauma, indirect appearance of pope
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-14
Updated: 2020-05-14
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:02:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,946
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24189328
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ephemeral_Joy/pseuds/Ephemeral_Joy
Summary: Kiara has insomnia. JJ has nightmares. Both lost their friends in a storm.But once they confide with one another, the sun will finally rise.
Relationships: JJ/Kiara (Outer Banks)
Comments: 22
Kudos: 191





	Hold Me While You Wait

**Author's Note:**

> My first OBX fic! Yay!
> 
> Disclaimer: I've been writing for "Anne With An E" for nearly four years so... my apologies if i didn't completely filter out my archaic vocabulary lol. LMM would be proud. also you'll lowkey feel stydia vibes and i'm not sorry.
> 
> edited/not beta'd/title from Lewis Capaldi

It has been forty-five days since John B and Sarah went missing at sea.  _ Missing _ , Kiara reminded herself, not dead. After that night, she finally understood what John B went through. What he felt. While she did support him back then, she had always thought his father died, like JJ and Pope. 

Forty-five days. They’ve been worried sick for  1080 hours and school didn’t even care! They just said to keep moving on! Carry on like two students, two of their friends, didn’t just fall off the edge of the earth. Kiara was angry. Every single day. At least she didn't go to the rich Kook school, not seeing the stupid faces of Topper and Kelce and all those rich clones they’re friends with. 

And despite junior year being a lot harder than they expected, the group hardly learned. Even Pope, who loved school, didn’t have the appetite for maths. JJ  _ never _ had an appetite for school, but Kiara knew he had a secret knack for history, learning dates and all that. And she? Kiara scoffed - she turned on her side once again - she’d cram for finals. Her parents hated this behaviour of her, only coming home for food and clothes, but the only place she felt safe was in the Chateau. 

If only she could catch some fucking sleep!

But she mulled. She kept worrying. Kept trying to understand what happened that night. What made them decide to head into the storm without hesitation. They would’ve found a solution for this. A way out. (The truth?) It didn’t have to be this way. 

Kiara felt her body tense up. The truth. The truth was that Sarah’s dad was a  _ killer  _ and no one gave a shit. The police suspended the case after John B and Sarah’s disappearance, because it was “sensitive”. Bullshit. Fucking bullshit. Money dirtied this case and everyone knew it. 

Kiara turned on her stomach with a huff, pushing her matted hair away from her neck.

‘Ah!’ A scream next to her ripped through his throat, the body shooting upright. JJ. Kiara sighed. He’s been like this for weeks. Not only did Kiara sleep at John B’s house, but Pope and JJ too. Pope on the porch, the two of them in the double bed. She had been fine with the couch, but the boys preferred old-fashioned chivalry for some fucking reason and Pope didn’t want to sleep next to her after their little incident so it was JJ and her. He made one lewd comment about it, and that was final. 

Only, he did have nightmares nearly every night. Like now. 

JJ, still unconscious, kept screaming, trashing the sheets as tears streamed down his face. It was worse than usual, Kiara noticed, dread dropping to the bottom of her stomach. She instantly forgot about her clammy hands and neck and grabbed onto him. 

‘JJ!’, she whisper-shouted, shaking his arm. Fear built in her body, trying to keep him still but not wanting to hurt him. He may seem tough, but she knew it was just a front. Being able to punch someone in the face meant shit. She repeated his name. 

He jerked awake with a yell, saliva running down chin and sweat brimming his forehead. He looked sick. She briefly wondered if his dad ever took care of him when he had a fever or a cold, or if his mom (for the first three years she was present before she decided to dip) did. Kiara may be against the conventional lifestyle her parents wished she subscribed to, but she did have fond memories of staying home and letting her mom take care of him. Caressing her hair after a nightmare, watching cartoons with her. Every time she lingered on JJ’s abysmal childhood, her heart felt heavier. 

‘JJ,’ she said, grabbing onto his shoulder, fingers massaging into his neck. His bleary eyes found her, heavy breathing slowly calming down.

‘Wha-?’

‘You had a nightmare.’ She took a glance out of the window, but Pope was luckily still asleep. 

‘Oh…,’ he mumbled, wiping the tears and sweat of his cheek. Kiara knew what he was about to do and instantly shut it down as she saw the grin building on his lips. 

‘Don’t.’

“Kiara…’

‘No. Please,’ she begged, voice hoarse. She was tired of him pretending he was fine. She was tired of playing along. If John B’s mania brought him to his… disappearance, she won’t let the same happen to JJ’s stupid tactic of avoiding his feelings. 

He remained quietly, surprisingly, eyes roving across her face. This was unknown territory for her. She always took care of the group, but this was on an intimate level. She tried to recall what else her mom used to do.

‘What did you dream about?’

JJ sighed, closing his eyes and letting his head fall back on the pillow. Kiara tentatively layed next to him, hands on stomach, and waited.

After a few minutes, almost making her think he fell back asleep, he said: ‘I was on The Phantom. Just me. I was in the storm that…,’ he faltered, ‘and i felt so calm. Like it was meant to be me and not them, but then you were there too and you said I forced you to come with me and then we,’ he gulped, ‘drowned. We drowned. And,’ his pushed himself up on his elbows, eyes boring into hers with pure guilt. ‘it looked so… real. And-’

Kiara stopped him, pulling him into a tight hug. He smelled bad and felt clammy, but she didn’t care. Is this what he had been dreaming for weeks? Them dying over and over again? She went cold all over just thinking about it. 

‘It’s okay,’ she whispered, placing his head in the crook of her neck and brushing each blonde curl with care. 

‘I don’t know how to stop them.’

‘It’s a dream. It’ll go away.’

‘I don’t know, Kie.’

She pulled away, forcing him to look at her ‘It will. Tomorrow I’ll make a dreamcatcher for you - you remember when I used to be obsessed with those? - and we’ll hang one on the wall.’ She jabbed her thumb at the wall behind them. 

A genuine smile tugged at his lips. ‘You better tie those shitty feathers on the strings.’

‘Idiot.’

His smile, crooked and cracked but perfect to her, widened. They remained quiet for a moment, staring at each other in amicable silence. Outside, the sun slowly began to rise, colours filtered by the serene waves and crashing into yellows and greens. Damn. She just hasn’t slept at all. 

‘How are  _ you _ … coping?’ He frowned, seemingly unsure how to tread this path of their friendship. JJ never quite reached “mom friend”-status. 

Kiara bit her lip. She never talked to the boys about her problems, because, well, did she even have the right to do that? As much as she denied her it, she was a Kook. She did have money. She did have a steady homelife. She would get out of Outer Banks after high school, because she got a monthly allowance. The boys had to think long and hard about how to spent their money and if she wanted to, she could just splurge it all at a Forever 21 two hours away. 

(Thank God she learned about fast fashion three years ago - what a horror show.) 

But she was a Kook, and that was why she would never fully comprehend what they went through (even though she got discriminated against as well by associating with them). She was scared she’d come off as snobby if she complained. 

And yet, JJ asked her. He  _ wanted  _ to know.  _ Wanted  _ to help. The realisation that the sun was rising and no rooster was making noise, made her crumble. 

Sobs wracked her body, weeks of pent up sadness and anger crashing down. John B and Sarah were probably  _ dead  _ and no one gave a shit and no one has been able to contact his son of a bitch uncle and Rafe was left scot-free just like his cowardice dad and she was failing all her classes and she cared even though she said she didn't she did care because she wanted to study environmental sciences in college and then save the planet but if she failed her classes she had to redo her year and never get into college and stay in Outer Banks to work as a waitress for the rest of her life and-

‘Kiara! Calm down! Hey, hey, hey!’, he soothed, his voice taking on an unfamiliar tone of softness. Fond, almost. She then realised her breathing had gotten too quick - she was hyperventilating. Shit. What did that article say again when you had an attack like that? Something with the senses?

‘Kiara, look at me.’

Trembling, she finally listened to his voice and looked at him. The frown was etched deeper into his forehead as his callous fingers caressed her hair and cheeks. 

_ Listen to his voice. Feel his fingers. See his eyes. Taste the salty tears. Repeat.  _

Slowly, she calmed down, in disbelief she just experienced that. She, cool and collected, just went through that. What the hell. 

‘I’m sorry,’ she said. 

JJ laughed. ‘Don’t worry. We’re both fucked up.’

Kiara puffed, focusing on the way his fingers went down her neck, sloping across her arms to her hands. She grabbed onto them, the touch comforting. He rose an eyebrow, but said nothing. She recounted her thoughts, the whispers between them like secrets.

‘Shit,’ he mumbled, ‘I guess we were all just faking sanity.’

‘I guess,’ she repeated. The sky turned red, the light inside becoming a rosy hue. Softer. Less harsh. Kiara sighed. They were just  _ teenagers _ . Pope was the first to turn seventeen of their group, in February. But would they be in a celebratory mood by then? She didn’t know what she’d prefer. 

‘Would it help if...’ he trailed, suddenly turned abashed. Kiara grimaced. ‘if I held you? Maybe you’ll be able to sleep?’

She opened her mouth, ready to reject that offer. It’d be weird and change things and not for the better and what if Pope saw? But then she realised she was still holding his hands and how relaxing that alone was. Him cuddling her to sleep? She’d be out in a heartbeat. Kie bit her lip.  _ Pogues don’t mack on Pogues _ , but this was strictly platonic. Right? Right. 

‘Okay,’ she whispered, carefully laying down and letting him envelop her. He wasn’t a teddy bear, but he was taller than her and his chest was soft enough for her to be comfortable. She sighed with relief, exhaustion weighing her body down. Kiara threw her leg over his abdomen, digging her face into the crook of his shoulder.

‘Sleep tight, Kie,’ he lulled, sleep also overtaking him once again. 

‘Sweet dreams, JJ.’

(Pope would find them entangled at 1PM, JJ with a content smile on his sleeping face and Kie disappearing between the sheets and his safe arms. Pope would feel a pang of jealousy, but moreso contentness that they’d been able to sleep. He heard JJ’s scream last night, but knew Kiara would have it under control. He wouldn’t tease them about it later, but he’d notice. He’d notice a lingering stare, a secretive smile, a pensive gaze. More touches, less distance. After a while, they would go to parties again, but JJ would only hang around Kie, not being his usual player-self. Pope would wonder when the other shoe dropped, when they went back to old habits. But they wouldn’t. They would continue to grow alongside of each other, and slowly but surely, intertwine.) 

**Author's Note:**

> find me on tumblr @lydias--stiles


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